Modesty

The thing about modesty is that it all revolves around love.

A love for the LORD that completely satisfies a woman in a such a way that she is able to resist the temptation to be affirmed by the eyes of men.

A love for others that will cause a woman to dress appropriately not only because she knows that a gentle and meek spirit is precious in the sight of God but also to guard the hearts of her brothers in faith, not allowing her body to distract them from honoring the LORD.

A love for women that are younger in the faith that are watching her and learning what it means to be a godly woman by her example. She is either teaching them that it is okay to put her body on display for the world to see or to clothe herself in godliness.

So the question to be asked is, how are you loving God and others with what you are wearing?

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To all the women,

To all the women: Just because a man likes it, doesn’t mean he respects it. There’s nothing respectable about 1000 likes from a flock of men staring at your butt, breasts, thighs, duck faces and tongue lashes; imagining what they’d do to you in bed. You’re no longer a woman in their eyes, you’re an object, a piece of meat, a vain imagination in the eyes of a luster. You want be sexy and feel beautiful, I get it. But being loved and respected should mean more. Beauty is in modesty and a man won’t love a woman he can’t respect.

A lady never has to tell anyone she’s a lady. Everyone already knows.

Men and Sex

You know when you have to use the bathroom really badly, you are running to the bathroom and unzipping and pulling down your pants like you’d win a prize for doing it the fastest? Those actions are the same of an aroused man. (I’m sure women are like that as well, but that’s another story.)

No matter how old and no matter what the romantic (or lack there of) situation, I’ve found, men really just love that three-letter word. It’s amazing, of course, but most of the time, it seems like that is all they are after. And when it’s all over, they are either finished with the situation or coming back for more.

That’s what I have found. And I have never felt more objectified in my entire life.

Don’t promise that you’ll stop or go slow or keep things “up to [me]” when you really don’t mean it. Don’t say that you care when you can’t even stop yourself from ripping someone’s clothes off. Don’t say you’re “not like other guys” when you can’t ask me if I want to OR if you do what you want no matter what. Just don’t.

That’s it. I feel like an object. I feel like a pleasure toy. I know I’m not but the way things are going, it’s hard not to feel that way.

Talk to Her – i.a

When you talk to her, talk to her
Like you want somebody to talk to you mama
Don’t get smart with her, have a heart to heart with her
Just like you would with your daughter

‘Cause everything you do or say
You gotta live with it everyday

She’s somebody’s baby
She’s somebody’s sista
She’s somebody’s mama

Now when you go to her, speak truthfully
Be honest as you can be, from your heart
You’re in a situation, where you’re losing patience
Take some time and look her in the eye

When you just can’t find the words you want
And it’s hard to reach the point

Where you both can understand
Don’t just tell the truth
Tell the whole truth
It’ll make a better man out of you

It doesn’t matter if she’s wearing
A mini skirt or a business suit
Whether she’s 25 or 99,
Treat her the way your mama taught you to

She could be the Queen of Sheba
She could be a school teacher{!}
Homemaker or a lawyer

Now let’s keep it real
Nothing in this world could ever exist
Without its opposite:
There has to be a sun and moon
A man and a woman
And that’s just the way it is

When you talk to her, talk to her
Like you want somebody to talk to your mama
Just like you fight for your sister
If you knew that somebody dissed her

How you gonna care for your daughter
Turn around and talk bad about her mama?
Same way you listen to your auntie
Never interrupt while she speaks

Make your words sweet like candy
As if you were talking to your granny

If you really loved then say so
If you really needed then say so
Love the way she thinks, say so
You love the way she speaks, say so
When you need some good conversation, say so
If you want her in your life, say so
You want her to be your wife, say so
Tell her she’s your best friend- say so
You’ll be there to the end- say so
If you’re thinking about leaving, say so
If you wonder where she’s going, say so
If you need to breathe with her, say so
You just want to be with her, say so
If you love her hair, SAY SO 🙂
If you want her there, say so
Tell her if you really wanted her- say so
If you feel like loving, say so

This song played (by india.arie) while I was studying and I had to stop to post it…I’m at a loss for words with this song.

What defines BEAUTY?

What defines BEAUTY?

You know those ads on the side of your screen that pop up every once in a while? Those inappropriate ads with either a real female or a fake one? Those ads where the only way they know how to draw you in is by a woman’s body? Those ads that seem to believe that the best thing about a woman is the size of her breasts and bottom? Those ads that never promote any other body type other than a Coca-Cola shape? Those ads that honestly, really just make you feel bad about yourself because you’re not paying someone in order to look like that OR because you’re not a “perfectly”-drawn cartoon? Those dumb ads. You know which ads I’m talking about, right? Well, there is only one thing to say about those ads:

FORGET. THOSE. ADS.

They are indirectly defining “beauty” by those “perfect” women with “perfect” bodies that make perfect girls and women feel flawed. Forget those stupid ads. You’re gorgeous. You’re beautiful. And if anyone tells you otherwise, their way of thinking is flawed, not you. Take care of yourself and remember that what your body looks like is what YOUR body looks like. Not like that celebrity’s, not like that model’s, not like that 3D cartoon’s… If you want to better yourself, better yourself for and strictly for you. No one else. Because what’s yours is yours and you can only look like you so be a perfect you. Forget those ads and any other ones you see.

Wide hips, narrow hips. Big booty, little booty. Short legs, long legs. Large boobs, small boobs. Curly hair, straight hair. Lean shape, curvy shape. A little more, a little less. Whatever you are, be who you are perfectly. Don’t let anyone else define you. Feel sorry for that person or those people because they have yet to grasp what real beauty is.

Besides, this is what real beauty is: “Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They trusted God and accepted the authority of their husbands.” (1 Peter 3:3, NLT) Oh, wait… oh my… That’s crazy… I do not see anything about a woman having that “perfect” figure. Hm. Well what do you know? Can’t argue with the Bible, now can you? 🙂

You’re beautiful. STAY beautiful- inside and out!

Gender Roles

I feel like this page is evolving… I haven’t had the need to post any releases lately (as in since… whenever the last time was that I posted one) but we’ll see where this goes!

So in one of my English classes, we read a play and have to do a context research assignment on the early 1900s. We all got to choose our topics and I chose “women.” Pretty huge, so I split it up into three different subtopics: Women’s roles, the view of women, and domestic violence.

Women’s roles in the early 1900s were what they still are now: Keeping the house, caring for children, and (contrary to today) staying at home (if the woman was single or if her husband was not making enough money).

The view of women was… I can’t even think of a word. Incompetent, to say the least. Men didn’t need women, women were seen to have simple minds and needed men!

Domestic violence, I’ve come to the conclusion, didn’t exist. If your husband hit you, he hit you.

Now, here’s my take on gender roles (women specifically), regardless of the year. Women should keep the house together and care for the children, naturally. But I mean she needs to like DO IT do it. When I am blessed with my man of God and a fabulous marriage, oh my goodness… It will be just… ah! Haha. When my husband comes home, there is going to be dinner (or lunch) waiting for him, always. When he wakes up in the morning, he will have breakfast ready, always, regardless of the time I have to be somewhere. The house will always be kept clean. So clean, dirt and dust will look at it and won’t even want to mess it up! A woman should always keep the house (and children, if there are any) together and make it a haven for her man.

I’ve been viewed as a lowly woman before, so I’m not sure how to take my own personal view of how I’d like my future husband to see me, or how any husband should see his wife for that matter. I know that he should respect the fact that she indeed is the weaker vessel, even if she does not want to admit it. He should care for her, remember that she is delicate, and treat her with complete delicacy. I will say, though it may rage a person or two, that when a woman gets out of line, she should be reminded of her position in the marriage. I can’t say what that reminder should be (simply because I do not know), but the woman should never try to be the man. It just doesn’t work that way.

Domestic violence. Hmm… I guess this goes into the woman being reminded of her position. But obviously, this is to an extreme… I don’t know. I mean, if you’ve read my older posts, you know that I’ve been abused but it seemed… necessary? I don’t know, I don’t want to sound crazy but it just seems like that’s how it is. Now, in NO way am I condoning this or saying that it is “essential” for marriage or to keep the woman in her place. Not at all. I’m just saying, that’s what I’m used to. I feel like sometimes it’s just inevitable. Maybe? I don’t know. Maybe one day I’ll see different.

So those are my opinions! 🙂