Christian and Gay

I never understood homosexuality. For me, I was Paul, persecuting those who identified as “gay” or “lesbian.” I was never one to protest, tell people they’re going to hell, that God hates them, etc. I just didn’t understand how the two could mix: Christianity and homosexuality.

If you’re gay, okay. Live your life however you want. I’m not going to be angry with or oppose you.

But in terms of Christianity? It’s an abomination. It says so in our Bible. So why is it even a topic of conversation at churches and Christian schools, like mine?

I never believed that people “couldn’t help it” or were “born this way.” Not until…

…not until about two weeks ago. I made a new friend. She is gay. She is Christian. She loves God but finds herself attracted to girls. She told me that if she could “turn it off,” she would because it would make her life so much easier… but she can’t.

She’s prayed about it, she’s been prayed over, she’s spoken to her pastor, she’s met with a Christian counselor, and… nothing.

Life didn’t make sense for the longest when she told me her story. I was so confused. I still am.

What’s even more confusing? She likes me… And you know what’s crazy?

I like her too.

Modesty

The thing about modesty is that it all revolves around love.

A love for the LORD that completely satisfies a woman in a such a way that she is able to resist the temptation to be affirmed by the eyes of men.

A love for others that will cause a woman to dress appropriately not only because she knows that a gentle and meek spirit is precious in the sight of God but also to guard the hearts of her brothers in faith, not allowing her body to distract them from honoring the LORD.

A love for women that are younger in the faith that are watching her and learning what it means to be a godly woman by her example. She is either teaching them that it is okay to put her body on display for the world to see or to clothe herself in godliness.

So the question to be asked is, how are you loving God and others with what you are wearing?

God’s Amazing

Isn’t it amazing how we tell God what we want, how He turns it into what we need, and how that then becomes everything we could’ve ever wanted?

God, You are amazing. You are CRAZY amazing. ❤

Sing Praise

I find it amazing how David continually wrote psalms and sang praises to the LORD, regardless of his situations. Fleeing for his life, shaking in fear, hiding in a cave as a completely innocent man… yet he still chose to praise and honor the LORD. He still chose to acknowledge His goodness and be thankful for His protection. We really have to take a step back and look at our bad situations differently because we might miss all that God is doing. Even when it seems like He isn’t doing a thing, He is still worthy of our praise.

Crying Out

I cry out

For Your hand of mercy to heal me

I am weak

And I need Your love to free me

O, LORD, my Rock

My strength in weakness

Come rescue me, O LORD

There’s something about crying out to the LORD in your weakest. There’s something so comforting, before anything has even changed, about knowing that God has heard your cry and will answer, heal, and mend you in His time.

I was listening to Isaiah 38 last night (en Español) and this stuck out to me:

In those days Hezekiah became sick and was at the point of death. And Isaiah the prophet the son of Amoz came to him, and said to him, “Thus says the LORD: Set your house in order, for you shall die, you shall not recover.” Then Hezekiah turned his face to the wall and prayed to the LORD, and said, “Please, O LORD, remember how I have walked before you in faithfulness and with a whole heart, and have done what is good in your sight.” And Hezekiah wept bitterly.

Then the word of the LORD came to Isaiah: “Go and say to Hezekiah, Thus says the LORD, the God of David your father: I have heard your prayer; I have seen your tears. Behold, I will add fifteen years to your life. I will deliver you and this city out of the hand of the king of Assyria, and will defend this city.

Isaiah 38:1-6, ESV

 

En aquellos días Ezequías enfermó de muerte. Y vino a él el profeta Isaías hijo de Amoz, y le dijo: Jehová dice así: Ordena tu casa, porque morirás, y no vivirás.

Entonces volvió Ezequías su rostro a la pared, e hizo oración a Jehová,

y dijo: Oh Jehová, te ruego que te acuerdes ahora que he andado delante de ti en verdad y con íntegro corazón, y que he hecho lo que ha sido agradable delante de tus ojos. Y lloró Ezequías con gran lloro.

Entonces vino palabra de Jehová a Isaías, diciendo:

Ve y di a Ezequías: Jehová Dios de David tu padre dice así: He oído tu oración, y visto tus lágrimas; he aquí que yo añado a tus días quince años.

Y te libraré a ti y a esta ciudad, de mano del rey de Asiria; y a esta ciudad ampararé.

Isaías 38:1-6, RVR1960

 

I’m not sure what more there is to say… but how awesome is it that we have a God who hears our prayers, studies our hearts, and sees our tears. Praise the LORD. Gloria Dios.

 

 

What Do I Know Of “Holy?”

I made You promises a thousand times
I’ve tried to hear from Heaven
But I talked the whole time
I think I made You too small
I never feared You at all
If You touched my face, would I know You?
Looked into my eyes, could I behold You?

So what do I know of You
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
But the shore along Your ocean?
Are You fire? Are You fury?
Are You sacred? Are You beautiful?
So what do I know? What do I know of “Holy?”

I guess I thought that I had figured You out
I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about
How You were mighty to save
But those were only empty words on a page
Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be
The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees

What do I know of “Holy?”
What do I know of wounds that will heal my shame?
And a God who gave life its name?
What do I know of “Holy?”
Of the One who the angels praise?
All creation knows Your name
On earth and heaven above
What do I know of this love?

What do I know of “Holy?”

I Understand.

To A Reader,

I know how you feel.

It’s easy to be a human and to want someone to “complete” you. But it’s hard to be a Christian, sometimes, and admit that you desire someone special in your life.

It’s easy to be a human and want to feel wanted. But it’s hard to be a Christian and confess that you are not fully content, sometimes.

It’s easy to be a human and have the desire to serve and to love. But it’s hard to be a Christian and tell the LORD that you want a physical presence, not just a spiritual. Sometimes.

It’s easy to be a human and yearn to be loved. But it’s hard to be a Christian and say that you know Jesus loves you, but Jesus loves everybody, and you want someone who loves you and only you.

It’s hard. I understand. And you’re never the only one.

– JJH

On Being A Christian

Being a Christian is the hardest thing in the world. It is the most painful thing, it is the most selfless thing, it is the most hurtful thing… I know millions of people have it far, far worse than I do but I have to tell myself that it’s okay to hurt.

I do what I don’t want to do and I don’t do what I do want. Of course, sometimes I do what I want but it leaves me empty afterward.

I am feeling so sad. I will spare the details and jump to the conclusion: I just pray that God sends me someone. Someone of my own and someone very soon. All too often I’ve been the one to look at or talk to or laugh with when the other’s not looking. And it’s not like it’s done on purpose. I’m just, for some reason, too often put in that situation.

Do you realize how much that hurts? Like no man could ever be attracted to me unless I’m pleasing to him when his own woman isn’t.

Or if a man is attracted to me, once I don’t satisfy or do exactly what he wants or (one time) doing nothing wrong at all, I am just thrown out and tossed to the side like I never even mattered. Like I wasn’t there in the first place and with the assumption that I’ll “get over it.”

Sometimes, I really just want to do what I want and ditch this whole “waiting” thing.

But that would be foolish of me.

With all the hurt, though, sometimes it sure sounds like a good idea.

Purify Your Camp!

Why have we become afraid to address issues within the church? We’ve become used to keeping the peace rather than spreading the truth, possibly because the truth is the hard truth.
So, I must say, and very frankly,… Brothers and sisters, if you’re watching a movie or reading a book or whatever it is about witchcraft and wizards and magic, that is of the DEVIL. What are we doing?! Way too often, even at a God-fearing school, I have seen and heard references to Harry Potter and since it’s October, Hocus Pocus. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS?! It gets me so upset because it’s right in your face!!!! Do you not realize it or do you not care?! Purify your camp! Stop! That is of the devil!

It’s Not About YOU.

We’ve become so used to agreeing with everyone and keeping everyone satisfied. We try to keep Christianity happy and pleasing all the time. If you want to be a Christian, be prepared to get people angry, to have people disagree with you, even your own brothers and sisters. Christianity is the belief in God (and Jesus, the Son of God and the Messiah, and the Holy Spirit, the One sent by God after the death of Jesus). God is all love, yes, but that is not all that God is and the Bible says so. God is a jealous God. God experiences sadness. God’s anger blazes like fire. When God spoke to His people, He wasn’t stating everything that they should do, trying to persuade them to do the right thing. No, he told them what they should do and what they should not do and Christ did that as well. We’ve become so used to avoiding disagreements and discomfort but that’s what this is all about. You’ll never make anyone happy in this life and it’s a lot easier to not make anyone happy when you’re a Christian. Be prepared to speak the truth and if the truth upsets a non-believer, then pray for that conviction. If it takes the voice of God to speak to reach believers’ hearts and for them to accept the truth then were they believers in the first place? Look at the Pharisees. They believed in God and followed His Law better than anyone. Of course many of them were corrupted, as we know, but when Jesus came, the way, the TRUTH, and the life, they couldn’t believe in Him because he didn’t meet their needs and it went against their beliefs and their feelings. Jesus made them uncomfortable. Look at the rich man who was true to the Law his whole life but couldn’t let go of his riches. He walked away sad. He couldn’t let go because he found comfort in his riches. Christianity isn’t about what you believe and what you feel. It’s about what the Word of God says and if that makes you mad then you need to die out and give in to the LORD. The day you try to make the Word of God, Christianity, etc. about you, is the day you need to seek repentance.